Headlines

About ten years into the future...

Memory Hole News -- All the News That’s Fit to Forget -- June 14

  "Morning Mal. What’s up?"

NSA Officials Admit Manned Mars Mission Will Be Delayed Another Year

  "The usual crap."

2001 Anthrax Attacks Still a Mystery -- Nobody Gives a Damn

  "'Morning, Charles, glad to see you.'"

Fighting Intensifies In Middle East

  "Oh, sorry. Maybe I shouldn't read the news first thing in the morning."

Liechtenstein Refuses to Abandon Nuclear Program -- UN "Really Ticked Off"

  "I know it wakes me right up."

Administration Officials May Blame May Heat Wave on Sunspots

  "There is that."

UCLU Vows Fight For the Right to Bare Breasts

  "Anything they don't need to worry about?"

Anti-aging Treatment Recalled -- Blamed for "Shiny Happy" Syndrome

  "Not really. There's that space dust thing tonight that Rex isn't all worked up about, but he doesn't think it won't be anything."

Judge Refuses to Order Teaching of Hindu "Creation Science" in Kansas Schools

  "Jerry may not have anything interesting. There aren't any rumors of anything normal not being sighted in the Library of Congress, of all places."

Couple Claims Pet Dingo Kidnapped by Aliens -- PETCLAU Investigating

  "Really? He hasn't seen any hints of anything like that, but he didn't know nobody wouldn't be looking into it."

Civil Rights Group Fights Deportation of Illegal Aliens Caught Carrying Illegal Weapons -- "They Haven't Actually Committed Any Crimes"

  "They aren't having a meeting about it later this morning. Rex won't be there, and he probably won't want to bang some heads together on that space dust thing, either."

Increase in Autoimmune Diseases Over Last Century Blamed on Vacuum Cleaners

  "Okay. He won't try not to remember to avoid not being there.

Memory Hole News -- We Report, You Forget

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Author's note -- Links:
Memory Hole. I should point out The Memory Hole, which seeks to achieve the exact opposite of what MHN is doing.
June 14
NSA
Anthrax
Middle East fighting
Liechtenstein
Nuclear proliferation
UN
Sunspots and climate
Edit 8/23/06: I realized my comment on free speech needed some explanation. I'm working on it. Meanwhile, Here's a Wikipedia article about free speech in general.
Shiny happy syndrome
Space dust. I accidentally typed this search in as "space DUCT zodiacal light" and got over 61 thousand hits. Is the internet scary or what?
Hindu creation. Warning: obnoxious popups.
Kansas school science
Library of Congress
Dingoes
Aliens and pets
Illegal
Crime
Cleanliness and autoimmune disease
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